Healing Isn’t Linear

Healing isn’t linear. This is a phrase I hear a lot in the mental health world, including the social media mental health world. This is something that we can resonate with when we are in a good spot and then forget when we’re not. It can be really frustrating when we feel like we have processed something, changed our behavior, or stopped experiencing certain mental/physical health symptoms and then suddenly realize these patterns are back.

Some things that make us vulnerable to returning to old patterns:

• We’re stressed/overwhelmed

  • When we don’t have capacity, we will default to our patterns that come natural, not the new ones we’ve worked hard to incorporate into our lives

• We’re around family or with longtime friends

  • Changing our patterns can feel like we’re threatening our relationships and/or we’re triggered by past issues

• We’re physically ill/in pain

• Grief/loss

• Our basic needs aren’t being met (hungry, thirsty, tired)

It can feel like we’ve regressed or that our “progress” is erased. This can be totally defeating and make us feel hopeless. That being said, there is something different from where we are now vs where we were then, even when it doesn’t feel like it. The difference is that we have new tools now to deal with our old patterns and we have the experience of knowing we can get past it. That it isn’t forever, even if it comes back again. I hope you can hold onto this the next time you notice old patterns popping back up and give yourself some compassion.

As always, take what is helpful and leave the rest. I hope you have the week you need.